Opening a Door

Dear House,

I know that I have not taken care of you as I should.

Your floors are not clean. Your porcelain does not sparkle, and your windows do not shine.

I have let the children mar your walls and have left many projects undone.

It is NOT because I am no longer committed to you.

I assure you that I am not seeing another.

I just have not had the time needed to invest into our relationship. I attempt to do the bare minimum to keep up appearances, but I know that it is not good enough.

I am well aware of what I have swept under the rug and for that I want to apologize.

I want to improve.

I want to re-Comet.

I just have to prioritize and find the time between all of the other activities I am involved in.

You are important.

I would like to ask your forgiveness and assure you that I am trying to make you a priority again.

I will follow my cleaning schedule and will not leave you neglected.

I promise that I will not become angry at you and expect you to put a fantastic performance with just a few hours to prepare when company is coming.

Will you accept my apology? Do you believe me when I say I am going to be better?

GREAT!

*whew*

And now that we have finally re-opened our lines of communication, can I ask you a favor?

Can you please return the things that you are hiding from me in spite, such as my digital camera, Mr. Spie's gym bag, and our I-Pass transponder?

We really need these things and I think it would help our relationship if we both come "clean".

Wouldn't it be refreshing to wipe out all memories of our past indiscretions and start out again with a spotless relationship?

I anxiously await your response.......

or my missing items.

Sincerely,


Spie

What is it with me and maps?

Well, it's not December, but it is darn close. So I guess you are due a race report.

As you recall my goals were simple for my No Skirts Allowed Adventure Race.

They were to:

1. Not make complete fools of ourselves

2. Not to be DFL

Well, one out of two ain't bad! Let's just say that there is a reason for pre-race meetings.

My race was doomed from the start. My partner in crime's family had been suffering from illnesses left and right. My family could not get our act together and get out of town on time. Traffic was unbelievably bad through Chicago and Indiana.

Time and Health were not on our side.

My friend made it to the strongly recommended pre-pre-race meeting, the night before the race slightly late. She was able to get most of the information, pick up our packets, and get trained for the ropes course without a problem.

The morning of the race, we ran a bit late and got a bit lost (as is always the case). We arrived at the real pre-race meeting after all of the important information had already been imparted. In our rush to get our bikes to transition, our course plotted out, and me trained on the ropes course so I wouldn't die (as I was told "red means dead"), a brochure fell out of our course packet that we received that morning. As we are both veterans of many a running race, we thought that what fell out was one of those many local brochure/pamphlets that are inserted in the race packet only to be recycled when one returns home. We promptly disposed of the brochure (as we are not litter bugs) and continued on our merry yet hurried way.

(Insert ominous music)

The race was not at all what I expected. The web information was adamant that you have a mountain bike with knobby tires and bushwhacking clothes. We were required to carry a compass, knives, a fully stocked medical kit, a whistle, and space blanket. I was envisioning us ripping through the forest on some single track, dropping our bikes to scout out some obscure landmark with our compass, and completing some ropes challenges in between.

The actuality of the race did not match my vision in any way shape or form.

This race was really 2 events in one: an urban scavenger hunt and a hiking adventure.

Due to circumstances under our control, we only experienced one part of the race.

Our race started out with the volunteers stealing the front tire from one of our bikes. Our first task when the race started was to run to the barn and collect our front tire and put it back on our bike correctly. Each team carried a multicolored score card. Each box represented a task or clue we had to write down or complete. Certain colored boxes (Pepto -Bismal pink) were mandatory, all others were optional. Once our tire was on correctly, a volunteer initialed our first pink box and we were on our way..... or not.

In our hurry to get our bikes to the transition area, I forgot that I removed my bike bag (you know the one with the CO2 pump, cartridges, tubes, patch kit, tire irons) and put it in the car while it was in transit. So, while everyone else was riding out and starting their adventure, we were riding out to the parking lot to collect my bike bag.

Once we were assured of our bike safety, we took our time and checked our clue and the map that was included in our packet. We figured out the route to get to the location that held the next answer for our clue sheet. We took city streets on our mountain bikes to get to our next location which was located in subdivision..... and this is where our rapid decent into foolishness began.

I will just say that once you get used to being clipped into your bike, cages are not your friend. After I assured my partner that the full medical kit was not needed, that it was only a "flesh wound", we continued on our way riding on city streets filling out box after box with the requested information. We purchased baked good from Panera. We counted orbs around a fountain. We found out the date the library was founded. At each location we saw other teams with road maps. We wondered how they knew which road maps to purchase.

Finally, after following all of the clues on our sheet, we were at the park where you pick up the canoes. My partner's sister met us at the bridge, holding one of those maps everyone else had. Now, we changed from racer to inquisitors.

"Where did you get that map?" -- "The race start"

"Who gave you that map?" --"The race volunteers"

"What is on that map?"--"All of the clue locations are marked on this map. What? You don't have one of these maps?"

We promptly ran to the volunteers at the canoe pick up and told them that we did not have the map. They looked at us slack jawed and said.

"How did you even get here?"

Remember that brochure we threw out?.... um, yeah. Apparently they didn't stuff their race packets with brochures.

The radioed the race directors and told them our plight. They gave us their copy of the map and then carried our canoe to the river for us. (A special privilege apparently given to the last people to arrive at the canoe enter point). Chuckled a little at our expense and sent us on our way.

The canoe portion of the trip was not kind to us. We felt confident as we floated through our first rapid section and breezed past two teams who had, unfortunately, dumped. We tried, quite unsuccessfully, to navigate our way smoothly down the river. I was in the stern and that was not a good decision. Then everything took a turn for the worse....in the form of a submerged tree.

We dumped. I lost my paddle. It was cold and the water was even colder. We managed to get to shore and flip our canoe, which was now piloted by my friend. My job, to sing to her. At one point, we tried unsuccessfully to rescue my paddle, soaking me even more. The end of our canoe portion couldn't come soon enough. The canoe ride ended in a park and we were once again greeting by my friend's sister, who was the reason we could continue the race.

By the time we got out of the river, I am sure that I was in the beginning stages of hypothermia. I was shaking uncontrollably, I had lost feeling in my fingers and toes, and my lips were turning blue. Our cheering section took one look at me and asked if I wanted her coat. I took her generous offer without a second thought. I ended up stripping all my top layers off to my race singlet and clutched the coat to me in dire need of warmth. She also took my friend's wet coat in order to alleviate our load.

Health -- for me at that moment -- not the best.

At this point, after all of our pitfalls and pratfalls, we decided that we were only going to find the required clues in the park and hightail it back to our bikes. We quickly gathered our clues, recorded them on our now soaked score card, and hiked back to our bikes.

Our time deadline was 2:00. It was 1:15. Time, once again, was not our friend.

We breezed through the last required clues (a MAP really helps!) and began our trek home. Only to realize that the map we needed to get back to the race start was in the pocket of my friend's wet coat ----which was with her sister and not with us. We attempted, unsuccessfully, to use our heads and memories to return to camp, but after 6 hours of trekking around Indianapolis without any nourishment (as we incorrectly assumed there would be aid stations like at all the other running/triathlon races we participate in), we were not in our right minds.

Our salvation came in the form of the teams that were also bringing up the rear. We explained our plight and asked them if they would help us back to camp. We traveled as a peleton and return to camp with 15 minutes left in the challenge.

Frustrated at our circumstance, we threw down our clue sheet and rushed to the ropes course in hopes that we could do some of the challenges prior to them shutting down the race. We were able to try the high rock climbing wall and that was it. Disappointed, we returned to the race start to gather our emotions and garner some nourishment.

Before you have the sympathy cards written out for me and in the mail, there were several highlights to my adventure race.

1. The race shirt was the coolest race shirt I have ever received.
2. The volunteers were the friendliest, most helpful, and best dressed (all the men were wearing skirts) I have ever encountered.
3. I was introduced to and now love NOODLES company food.
4. I had the best partner ever. Despite everything she kept her sense of humor.
5. I now have a real adventure story.

We have tentatively talked of doing the race next year. We have many ideas and strategies we plan to implement. Thus far, our short list is~

1. Drive down the day before the race and stay at the camp in order to both make the pre-pre-race meeting and the pre-race meeting.
2. Arrive to the pre-race meeting on time. (Will be solved by implementing #1)
3. Make sure we have all the maps (Will be accomplished if we implement #2)
4. Bring nourishment for the race
5. Collect only the required clues during the urban scavenger hunt
6. Never put Spie in the stern of the canoe

Based on our plight, feel free to comment and add some recommendations of your own and if you are doing an adventure race of your own, I would suggest that you DO NOT ask me for any advice.

(BTW -- We were not DFL -- We were one above DFL.)